Not crying at Christmas

I'm not gonna lie or sugar coat it-Christmas is hard for me. Mom would always go shopping with me on Black Friday and as much as I love my husband-he's not the shopper my mom was. There were times, we couldn't get together to make Christmas cookies, but I'd put the phone on speaker and we'd jabber away making them anyway. I thought I'd roped Lauren into being my helper for Christmas cookies, but school and work keep her from helping as much as we'd like-gotta give it to her the girl is an oreo ball queen. Seriously, we did a whole batch in less than 15 minutes. Most of that time was letting them get cool in the freezer. Then, Christmas cards come and I remember Mom racing Stacia to get them in the mail first. But these days, I remember and laugh because there were so many really good times to remember.
Now I can stress out as to where I put everything-I think I found it all. Stayed within budget(a Christmas miracle). Once again, I didn't order enough Christmas cards and lost some addresses-so consider yourself lucky if you got one.It was too humid to make pralines-and come to find out two of my three biological kids hate pecans anyway. Grinch punch was cute, but strong enough to give me a hangover(come to think of it so did the egg nog the next night).
Things go wrong-they always do, but I got to see all the kids and we shared some laughter. I'm still struggling to take a picture of my fish-he's a beautiful black dragon named Harley (thanks Lauren) so you won't see a picture of him here today. Instead:

This is Miss Priss. Once all the presents were unwrapped, I was told to close my eyes and the kids led me outside. She's a Christmas present to me from them.
Seriously. Aren't parents supposed to surprise the kids?
I didn't cry, even though I thought about it. I just bit my lip real hard and reminded myself that if I started, I probably wouldn't be able to stop. Not sad tears, but Happy ones. There's not a thing in the world I need-but feeling the love that's the most precious gift of all and when you keep getting it-in massive amounts.
Well... it's enough to bring tears to your eyes.

It just happens

Every time our grandson and the dogs get together, I'm amazed. There's no snapping, no hitting, and no inappropriate  behavior by anyone. The dogs seem to know he's a little boy and they are so excited to see him-they run in circles wagging the tails and jump up and down until he pets them. Then, he has to find toys to throw for them. They kiss each other and watch each other sleep. I love watching the dogs stand near him just watching him sleep. They silently sit there wagging their tails until he moves. Some times, there are long periods of time that they don't get to see each other but nothing changes.

That Santa Thing

One of the feeds that comes up on my face book was discussing the merits of Santa Claus. A lot of people were really against lying to their children. I had no such problem.
I'll never forget when Beth was either eight or nine I was worried that her friends would make fun of her for believing or worse yet-they'd break the news and be cruel about it so I went on to explain that Santa was the spirit of Christmas and that Christmas magic was real. The man in the red suit just wasn't one that you could physically touch. She had questions and was amazed that I had time for stockings in the middle of the night. She said that her dad and I must really love our kids to go through so much trouble-she got the idea. I figured as long as that truth came out, I might as well come clean so I told her about the Easter Bunny and when I got to the Tooth Fairy, she covered her ears and proclaimed her whole childhood had been a lie.
We laugh about it now-and I've asked her what she'll do when she has children of her own-and she'll lie to them too.
There's just something about believing that all things can go as planned, that impossible tasks can be completed, and that sometimes people work year round expecting nothing in return.

Happy Thanksgiving

I hope wherever you are, that your Thanksgiving is wonderful and that you are truly blessed. For the first time ever, I won't see my parents or my siblings for this holiday. I'll miss them terribly, but all of my siblings came to help me celebrate Thanksgiving in the big town of Jasper, AR this past Sunday. That's right-they all came to my house and I hope everyone had a good time. I certainly did. I'm so lucky to have grown up with 3 siblings-3 siblings that have been my friends and continue to love me almost as much as I love and adore each one of them.

Succulent Pinterest success

Thumbing through pinterest one day, I saw a post on how to start succulents. Think little indoor plants that require very little water. I tried once and got nothing but rotted leaves. Then, I thought about it-these are the same people that said violets start roots at six weeks-wrong it's more like eight to eleven weeks. So I tried it again and eureka! Little succulents have started.

Just Wondering

My youngest daughter, Lauren, visited over the week and I've started the process of cleaning all the sheets. Yesterday, I put clean sheets on the bed and left for work. Not quite finished-no pillow cases or comforter on it. Today, I went to put the pillow cases on pillows and on the bed-right smack in the middle of the bed was a shiny penny. I fluffed the sheets before putting them on. No one has been in that room but me and the dogs. I refuse to believe that one of them picked up a coin in their mouth and jumped on the bed with it. The bed's an old one with high foot boards-so I can't lean over the bed and smooth out the middle-there's no way anything could have fallen out of my pocket(and I wasn't wearing anything with pockets). So where did that penny come from? There's no hole in the ceiling.
Then I remember "when an angel misses you-they toss a penny down. Sometimes just to cheer you up and to make a smile out of a frown"
Yes, I believe in angels but I'm not sure they can throw pennies. But the penny is there and the dogs aren't talking.

Pansy Time

The fall season means a lot of different things to different people.Pumpkins are everywhere. Hay rides, leaves changing color, foot ball games, bon fires, and even deer hunting. For me, fall means time to plant the pansies. The beautiful annuals that can't stand the Arkansas heat. They do well in the winter, and I love to see them blooming in the snow.  I usually don't plant annuals-after all, they're only good for one season. That all changed when my mom told me that they were my great-grandma's favorite flower. I started planting them as a way to remember her. It wasn't long before I started taking some to my mom to plant too.  Little by little stories would come out, and it gave me a glimpse of the short,                                                                                       German woman that could never

pronounce my name correctly. To her, I was Kaddie. I loved hearing those stories and learning about the past. Now, I realize that Mom looked forward to telling me those stories as much as I loved hearing them. It gave her a chance to talk about someone she loved and missed. I know Grandma ironed sheets and boxer shorts (sorry hubs, I didn't inherit that gene) and that she loved pizza and beer (that gene  I got). She also loved to listen to music as she cleaned house, going to movies, and reading stories. My name wasn't the only English word she had problems saying. Pistachio always came out sounding like piss-cry-tony. I remember that her accent was very heavy-and by the time I arrived she had been in the states a long, long time. She smelled of roses and watched Lawrence Welk. I was forced to watch it so many times, I remember words to the parting song. "Good night, sleep tight, and pleasant dreams to you. Here's a wish and a prayer that your dreams come true...."

Vacation day two Ruby Falls, Rock City Garden

Boy, day two was a busy day. We headed out early and went to Ruby Falls. Ruby was the wife of the man that discovered that part of the cave. The falls are in a large room carved out by water that took millions of years to create. The waterfall is over one hundred feet.

Then down the road a little ways is Rock City Gardens. If you ever get to go there, don't go on a hot day. Wear very comfortable shoes. Charge the camera and plan to spend the day.

Then we went on to The Tail of the Dragon, but that's another tale.

Coon Dog Cemetery ... Vacation day one

On our first day of vacation, we headed out before the sun came out. I can't tell you what time we left, but I know we were in Devall's Bluff (home of Craig's BBQ) long before the restaurant opened. We traveled just outside of Memphis and down south. Our first stop was a cemetery just outside of Tuscumbia, AL.
The Coon Dog Cemetery. The only one of its kind in the world. I don't know what I was expecting, but certainly not what I saw. The graves were immaculate. Decorated with flags, flowers, and coins. Yes, coins like the military. A penny on the grave if you knew the deceased. A nickel or dime if you fought along side of him and a quarter if you there when he died. There was even a leash or two on top of the marker.  The granite markers proudly displayed the name of the dog, the birth date, time of death and even championships won or words about the dog.
It was some time during this visit, I really missed my dogs. I know they aren't champions or coon dogs but they're very important to me-like all these dogs  were special to someone too. There's Troop, Ranger, Sally Ann, Roscoe-I wish I could remember all 85 names but the one that really hit me was the grave that read "Dixie". That's when the water works started. A kind man might have put his arms around his wife, but Dwight just kept taking pictures and got as far away as possible-the shower didn't last long. My dog sitter sent a picture of my babies playing and every thing was good with the world again.
Then we hit the road to lay our heads down in Scottsboro, AL. A total of a little over 560 miles behind us that day.

Aloha Camp Taloha

Many people have never heard of Camp Taloha and most people that have heard of it have no idea of its location. It sits on the outskirts of Pine Bluff down a logging road off of Sulphur Springs Road in the boonies. There's even a sign.
The Girl Scout powers that be have decided to close the camp and the final flag ceremony is Thursday the 22nd. Today.
If you walk down the logging road, the first thing you'll come to is the flag pole. It won't be flying the Camp director's panties for the ceremony, and I wonder if they'll end the ceremony with a friendship circle. All significant ceremonies end with the friendship circle.
The road forks at the flag pole and if you take a right, you'll end up at the lake. It's situated so that voices echo across the water which is a lot of fun if you're trying to scare someone on the other side. When the girls sing, their voices carry across the lake and they sound like angels.(sounding is as close as they ever got). Many girls caught their first fish at this lake. There were canoe races and nights spent watching falling stars on the banks.
Headed back to "camp" on the right is the bunk house. I've forgotten its name, but it was reserved for the older girls that came to camp. What a privilege it was to stay there. No wondering out at night to use the rest room-there was one indoors. Because it was so close to the hall, you could also catch a couple of extra winks of sleep.
Next came "K" hall aka the dining hall, craft room. Everyone ate here and sometimes the tables and benches were pushed back and the place became a dance hall. That's right. Those uneven wooden floors were perfect for the Macarena, the cha-cha slide, the hokey pokey, and even the chicken dance.
It was there I petted a possum for the first and last time. Not that she was dining or dancing, she was an invited guest coming to educate us on nature.
Not too far from "K" hall is the cement pond. The pool was a life saver during the dog days of summer. Arkansas heat and no air conditioner can take its toll.  Many girls would have gladly given up their right arm instead of losing pool privileges. The same Camp Director that had flying panties helped me unload all of the ice machines and dump them in to the pool just before the early bird swim one morning. Boy, there were some screeches. I think she laughed harder than anyone. It was in that pool, that I got my life guard certification.
Leaving the pool, you passed the bath house. I don't care how much you cleaned them, there were always enough spiders/frogs for at least one scream.
Then you would come to a circle of cabins. The windows were screens that you could cover with tarps if it rained. In the inside, the beams were exposed and many nights were spent on the cots looking up reading signatures and advice left from campers long ago. Some campers found signatures from their moms and older sisters. There were never any ladders left in the cabins for us to climb up and leave our signatures but that didn't stop us. Cheerleader pyramids have nothing on girl scouts determined to leave their mark on the world.
The last thing you'd probably notice would be the fire ring. Nothing left but ashes now. You know there were tons of ghost stories told around that fire ring, but what you probably don't know is that's where I found hope for the "Future Generation". After the stories were spent, sooner or later a young girl would talk about something bothering her. It might be her parents divorce or being bullied or may be some stupid boy had broken her heart. Another girl would offer some encouragement or maybe two of them would chime in. Before you knew it, these girls would be hugging and solving the problems of the world. So much love. So much strength. You may see the ashes, I see the warmth around the fire ring.
All those little girls have grown up now. Some even have daughters of their own, but they still have the love and strength they showed me all those years ago.
I've thought long and hard about attending the final flag ceremony. It's a four hour drive and I could physically do it, but my heart just won't let me.
I'll keep Camp Taloha in my heart with my memories. A circle is round and has no end and that's how long I'll cherish them.

Anchovy Pizza

This week end my sister hosted a little get together for my nephew's home coming. I was really surprised-she had pizza with anchovies. I love pizza with anchovies, turns out she does too. Then one of my nieces exclaims that her dad (our brother) loves them too. Whoa, three siblings out of four love anchovies. What are the chances? Then we had to confer about the youngest and behold according to my brother and sister, she too likes anchovies. You might not consider this significant, but I've thought long and hard and I can only come up with two other people that like anchovies.
1. Our mom and 2. Our dad
Maybe the family tattoo should have a fish instead of a chicken leg?

End of Summer...Celebrating life

 A couple of weeks ago, I posted some pictures of a beautiful place called Falling Waters. At that time, I had a walking cast on and couldn't jump into the water. What I neglected to say was that I was a little bit glad that I couldn't jump. Heights terrify me-they always have. So much so, that I used to con my kids into hanging Christmas lights for me. Now they've all grown up and moved out so if I want lights, I have to hang them myself or sweet talk someone else into doing it for me. But jumping in the water? It's a pretty good distance up, I told myself it was only six feet up. My husband informed me I really do have a problem judging distances. It's more like 20 feet up. But fear shouldn't stop you from doing something you want to do. It might slow you down or make you think about the consequences but it shouldn't stop you from doing something you really want to do. So I jumped and ended my summer with a splash. Then, I jumped again because I could. Given the chance, I'll probably do it again too.

Happy 6th Anniversary Dwight

I have found the one
whom my soul loves.
Song of  Solomon 3:4

Falling Waters

Dwight had a long, hard six day work week so a little two wheel therapy was not in the plans because he was tired. Know what's  just as good as a Sunday bike ride? A Sunday drive with the pooches and a couple of family members thrown in. The dogs were incredibly excited to jump in the jeep-so excited that they didn't mind leashes or having to be quiet. We started off with a little drive through Gene Rush Forest. The jeep had a minor problem so we had to stop in the middle of bear country. Lots of bear sign and fresh scat but luckily no hungry bears were to be seen. A little further down the road, we found some Oyster mushrooms just ready to be picked.

The forest was really pretty despite the hot dry summer. We drove through Richland Campground(must visit again soon) and onward to Falling Waters. The road was closed due to a washout, but we figured we weren't far from the falls because we could hear them. Sure enough, just down the hill and around the bend:

The water just barely had enough for one waterfall, but the entire place is beautiful. Dwight wouldn't let me jump into the pool with my cast, but now that I know where the Falls are, I intend to visit again.

Just look at Dixie, you know she wanted to jump right?

If you're looking for this place, don't expect to find any signs. Just take Hwy 16 and take Falling Waters Road-it's on your right deep in the forest down a long gravel road.

Missing somebody

There's not a day go by that I don't miss my mom. Some days more than others, but there always seems to be something that reminds me of her. This week is the Newton County Fair. As usual, I've entered some things-just like she would have.
The last time I talked with her I told her that her turkhens had been ordered. Tall tales say that turkhens are a cross between turkeys and chickens. That's not really true. Turkhens are a breed of chicken. They're supposed to be good for meat and they lay eggs too. Mom wanted to enter hers in the beautiful bird category. You know beauty is in the eyes of the beholder?

Ok this one might be cute on some level but it's young.

Now this is what she would have been entering:

I bet she could not have entered the paperwork with a straight face, but knowing Mom she would have walked away with a Grand Champion ribbon.

Enough already

August hasn't been my favorite month. The very first day I found out that I didn't have the gout or a stone bruise on my foot. Oh no, it had been sore for six weeks because I broke a small bone near the heel. No idea how I broke it, but the walking casts have really, really helped.
Then while hobbling around doing laundry, my favorite setting on the dryer wouldn't start. Fluffy cycle worked so I fluffed everything for a couple of days and then silence. Nothing. Nada.  None of the cycles worked at all. So I thought I'd take my time and shop around for a dryer. Go old school and hang clothes out on a clothes line. Hard to do with rain forecast for every single day. Every single day in August-no joke. Apparently hubster didn't like me hanging things from the shower because I have a nice "used" dryer.
Then for some strange reason, the dogs and another animal had a fight under my car. It took me a while to capture the wild wieners, but I did it and started to work. A light came on in my car that read "Check hybrid system immediately". Wth? What hybrid system? Where? So I took the car to the Toyota dealership and if they just replace the known damaged parts the cost will be around five hundred bucks. If the compressor and the other thingamajingy are shot the costs go up to around $5400. The adjuster is on the way to the repair shop to do what he does. It only took me two hours to acquire a rental car. Two friggin hours. I could have walked from the dealership to the rental place in that amount of time but there was a heat advisory out and the whole foot thing came into play. So I was in a really good mood and stopped at the feed store to get some egg pellets on my way to work. I thought I'd go ahead and get a coke, Maybe the sugar would improve my mood. Down the road and a couple of sips later? Coke Zero. As in zero sugar and zero appeal. Crap.
Usually the week end will improve my mood, but the forecast calls for clouds and rain. Clouds to block the biggest meteor shower of the decade. Rain to mess up my Bargains Galore on 64 (the ultimate 160 mile yard sale).
Maybe by the end of the month my luck will improve. Hopefully it will because if the foot doesn't heal properly surgery will be in my future. Something has got to go right some time.

August and goal setting

Every year I try to make twelve different kinds of jelly/and or jam. I don't think I've ever made twelve different kinds all in one year, but I keep trying. So far this year we have:
1. Strawberry Jam
2. Blueberry Jam
3. Jalapeno Jam
4. Peach Jam
5. Sassafras Jelly
6. Rose Petal Jelly
7. Carrot Cake Jam
8. Razzberry Jam

Eight months and eight done so far. Blackberries, apples, and mint are still possibilities. Still looking for the twelfth one.
9.Blackberry jam

Happy Second Birthday Oscar and Dixie

What would I do without you

My precious furry friend?

Part mischief, but all blessing

and faithful to the end

You look at me with eyes of love

you never hold a grudge...

you think I'm too wonderful

to criticize or judge

It seems your greatest joy in life

is being close to me

I think God knew how comforting

your warm soft fur would be

I know you think you are human

but I'm glad that isn't true

The world would be a nice place

if folks were more like you!

A few short years are all we have

One day we'll be apart

But you, my pet, will always have

A place within my heart... 

by Christina Isacci

Happy Birthday you two and Mommy and Daddy hope we have 

many, many more to celebrate together.

Concealed and carried

Months ago, Beth, Jody, Dwight and I took a conceal and carry class. This is so we can legally carry a concealed weapon. It was a lot of fun and I learned quite a few things. I reinforced my dislike for automatic guns. My reward? Dwight bought me the cutest little LCR (light carry revolver). I like revolvers because I know how many bullets are ready and where the brass is-too many times flying brass has hit me or went down my shirt (the boobs are not a fan).
So I've had my conceal and carry license for some time. I've never bothered to carry it with me because I'm usually with Dwight and he ALWAYS has his. I'm working nights now which means I get off at midnight and pull up the driveway around one am if I haven't done a Walmart run. This still hasn't been enough to encourage me to carry. Until..my father-in-law came to check on me yesterday morning. There was a breakout at the jail (no one I knew), but the jail is seven miles away. That crazy man scaled twelve feet of fence and razor wire to hit the Little Buffalo. The Little Buffalo feeds into the Buffalo (aka two miles from the house). He's accused of attempted murder and is considered dangerous so I'm protected. Went through two road blocks after I practice what to say to the police about the gun but all they wanted to know was if I had seen anyone suspicious. There was a heavy police presence going home too, but no more road blocks. I haven't see the escapee and they haven't either. I don't have a problem using the gun and I'm glad I have the choice to carry and that's about as political as I'm going to get today.

July

Wow! Can't believe how fast time is flying by. I've been busy with the garden. I've put up squash, zucchini, beans, jalapeno and bell peppers, and pickles. Learned to make a new salad. This weekend I get to help dig potatoes. It's very hot and dry so lots of watering has to be done.

The blame game

The news is saturated with articles on a child killed by an alligator in Florida. Social media is calling for people to stop blaming the parents. I understand that and I know they've suffered an unbearable loss. I can't imagine their pain and I know it was a tragic accident. ACCIDENT. If you believe it was an accident (as I do), you can't blame Disney either. It's Florida. Home to millions of alligators, snakes, and mosquitoes. There's a risk of coming into contact with any of those things on a daily basis. I don't think warning signs would have stopped this from happening. If alligator warning signs were up, it could have been a python. I have been to Florida only a couple of times and have seen large snakes and alligators  on the side of the road. People find them in their houses, under cars, and in the most unusual places. They are everywhere.
My hope is that a lot of education comes out of this tragedy. Alligators feed at dusk. They are more active during the nesting periods of late May, June, and July. No pet or small child should be allowed near the waters edge-not a man made lake, canal, pond, creek, or standing mud puddle especially at dusk. It's against the law to feed alligators because they will approach other humans for food or as a food source.
If you're traveling, please look into the dangers of where you're going. Are there wild animals that you're not used to dealing with? What kind of poisonous insects and snakes are common in the area? What do you do and where do you go if bitten? What about weather? Do you have a safe place? A back up plan?
A little bit of education can go a long way.
And accidents happen.
Tragic accidents.
And when they do, no one is to blame.

TBT a memory

So I didn't get up early enough to find a picture for TBT so you're stuck rehashing a memory with me. Let me explain. There's a huge box in my office for people to drop off shoes for children starting school in the fall. They've requested certain sizes that must tie. Both girls and boys need size one so I didn't bother to write anything else down and went shopping. Do you think I could find two pairs of size ones? Noooo much less cute ones or cool ones which brought up that memory I mentioned.
All the way back to 1995, when Beth started first grade and Paul started kindergarten. My brother was concerned about their shoe situation. They had shoes, but he wanted to make sure that they had "cool" shoes and took them shopping. He did this for years. Never asking my permission or asking for anything in return.
So I'm going shopping for school shoes for kids that aren't mine and I'm blaming my brother.

The Journey

Today I start another journey. It's not one that I haven't done before, but this time it's a little different. I'm not alone, but there's a little bit of fear involved. I've decided to breed Dixie. Not as a professional, but as one of those back yard breeders. Before you give me any lectures, let me remind you that there are bad people in any profession-look at the police and the priesthood. To label us all in one category is wrong. I've done a lot of research and put a lot of thought in to this venture.
The "date" is set for tonight and I may still back out-if he's not as pictured, if he's too big, if he doesn't act like a gentleman, if he treats Dixie badly, if she gives me "the look", or if she whines-it's off. I've searched for the last six months and this is the only acceptable male I can find-and he comes with a lot of good recommendations, but if he can't treat Dixie properly it's off. Not joking. I love Dixie more than a lot of people love their kids (sorry it's true). My own daughters can rebuff me when I tell them what a thrill it is to be a mom, but Dixie gets to do it at least once. I will feel terrible if she doesn't have a good pregnancy or enjoy the pups, but she's an adventurer and loves life so I think she will be ok.
If not ice cream will make it better or some really good treats (sorry Dad no chips after pregnancy is confirmed). Dixie will be really glad that it gets her out of the tight dresses and onesie dog sleepers for a while.
I have an emergency vet and a back up. I have a breeding mentor. I know that dachshunds typically have between two and seven pups their first litter. I have seven really, really good people that want a puppy. I'm prepared if they back out.
If tonight's date goes as planned, the puppies will be born the first week of August.

Happy 26th Birthday Son

Pinterest explanation

I'm aware that a lot of my conversations start with the words "I saw this thing on Pinterest...." and I've tried to cut back but then I saw a quote (guess where I found it)
"I have no special talents. I am just passionately curious."-Albert Einstein.
I am curious. What happens if ...? Can I do that? How hard is that to do? Will that taste good? Is it true?

So that led me to my activities last week end, it started with some soap. I love goats milk soap and wondered just how hard it would be to make my own. I ordered a melt and pour and a mold. Then added lavender essential oil and purple coloring-and success. Lavender goats milk soap. I'm growing lavender for the first time ever and soon I'll make some more and add flowers to the soap.
 Then I read a recipe on making chocolate syrup like Hershey syrup-and I wondered if it was that good and was it as easy to make as the recipe claimed-and the answer to both was yes-it is good and easy (added bonus was no preservatives and I know exactly how old it is).
I've made fajitas lots of times, but the seasoning I use is from Pinterest with no added salt or preservatives (you should also know it's a lot cheaper than those little packets in the seasoning department).

Suckiest Anniversary #2

A year ago, my sister pinned May 7th as the suckiest Anniversary ever because it was the one year anniversary of our mom's death. It still sucks. Not having her around. Realizing it wasn't just a really bad dream. Yeah, that shit really happened. It's getting further and further away from the last time I got a card or phone call from her.
People say time will make it better-and maybe it did for them but it hasn't for me. I've just gotten better at handling the pain. You know what? That's ok. Missing someone,  tears-that's all a part of life. Kinda like pushing through Walmart with all the hundreds of Mother's Day cards shoved all in your face. Sooner or later you're going to see one so stupid or incredibly tacky it will make you smile. There's beauty in everything. Those ugly tears my sisters cry-they make me wince for their pain but it makes me feel a little less alone. In a way, I'm glad we cry-not all mothers were like ours. Giving birth, doesn't sign you up for a life time of loving, caring, and  sharing. It doesn't automatically mean that you'll make birthday cakes or spend countless hours trying to make someone else happy. I wonder if my siblings remember the joy of picking out their favorite kool aide to go with dinner. I haven't thought about grape kool aide in a long time.
I remember her telling me how to measure the sugar-later I'd measure sugar to put in jelly or jam.
Her voice comes back to me telling me to make sure to premeasure the sugar, to add it quickly to help the jelly set up. Add a teaspoon of butter to keep the foaming down. That first batch of jam without her was rough. A lot of firsts are. This year I made "Rose Petal Jelly"-something she and I never did, but I think she'd like it. It set up fine and it really does smell like roses.
Roses like the ones she used to baby. Like the ones that Beth carried.
Roses like the ones that the grand kids carried after her funeral.
Roses like the ones tattooed on her grand daughters.
Roses are so beautiful and fragrant, but they can cause a little pain kinda like a memory.

A hard part of love

If you are anywhere near my facebook page, my desk, or cell phone, you know I love our dogs. Their pictures are every where. They're surrounded by toys and treats. Oscar and Dixie have a wardrobe that some people would envy. I watch their weight, what goes into their mouths, their sleep habits and monitor their activities(they are not supposed to jump long distances or chase horses). My point is we really care about these dogs. Unfortunately, Dixie has started chasing trucks. Not cars but just trucks. Living where we do, there are a lot of trucks. Keeping her inside 24/7 isn't an option. I hate seeing dogs constantly chained. Every morning, she and Oscar go out with me to feed horses and chickens and gather eggs. I can't have her leashed and carry eggs. She loves being outside, and I love having her outside with me.
So a huge part of disciple is love.

So I'm researching training collars.

and I have to find one that will fit a dog that weighs less than eleven pounds.

It's not that I want to put a training collar on her, I'm afraid of what will happen if I don't.  The invisible fences aren't an option unless I can rent a backhoe to dig and the yard where's she's allowed to run is huge.
This is so much harder than spanking a bum.

The Season before Turkey Season ie Morel Hunting

Here in the Ozarks, there's another hunting season before Turkey Season starts on April 16th.
People of all backgrounds are braving briers, poison ivy, and even snakes to snag up these tasty treasures. Below are some  Morel mushrooms that Dwight found:

I have not found any just yet, but in some parts of the world they've learned to grow them:

But at least the scenery is good:

For the 22nd Anniversary of my 29th Birthday

Yeah, good luck with the math on that one. I'm fully awake and still not sure I got it correct. Any way, Dwight and I are headed to Herman, Missouri for the Wurstfest. They celebrate their German heritage and all things to do with Weinners. Hence, the Weinner dog derby and parade in which Oscar and Dixie will participate. I'm not sure how old I am in this picture, but for years I was told this was my German dress.

Wish Oscar and Dixie luck

Oscar and Dixie are running their very first Wiener Dog Derby this weekend.
Cocktail Franks and dogs under 6 months old. Frankfurters (like Oscar and Dixie) are 7 months to 4 years old. Ball Park Franks are over 5.
Here's Oscar practicing-Dixie does not need the practice.

Happy 24th Lauren

Happy Birthday Lauren.
It's scary how quickly twenty-four years can fly by. I still remember going into labor with you. I remember your baby face and your bouncing up and down in the baby bed. I remember too your love of animals-rabbits, hamsters, goats, dogs, cats, and horses.
I hope you know how much you are loved.
Wishing you a very happy birthday and missing you!

Recipe time Lemon Fudge

I haven't posted a recipe in a while, and I made one from Pinterest that I really like. I would copy and paste, but I made my own adjustments so really it's become my recipe for Lemon Fudge.

Ingredients:
1 tsp lemon extract
1 tsp lemon zest (probably optional)
yellow food coloring-two drops
1 bag of white chocolate morsels
2/3 cup of whole milk or heavy cream
1 and a half cups of white sugar
one half stick of butter

Line an 8 x 8 pan with foil and spray with oil. Melt butter, sugar, and milk (or cream if you're using it) and boil for 5 minutes-watch not to scorch milk. Add food coloring, then  add extract and lemon zest and white morsels. Stir until morsels are completely dissolved and pour into pan. Refrigerate to firm up. You could probably omit the lemon zest if you were in a hurry. I added two drops of food coloring and that made it a pretty shade of yellow. Take it out of refrigerator to cut and enjoy.

February the month of Love

Yes, I know that Valentine's Day is long past. The flowers have wilted and the chocolate is long gone, but when I think of February I think of Leap year, the ground hog, and love.
Different people have different explanations on what love is and what it means. Obviously, some people think the gifts of  flowers and chocolate show their love. Others go a little more bold and give rubies in the shape of a heart (Dwight, I love it), but I had just a really weird week end and it reminded me of different kinds of love.
Some times love is telling some one something that they don't want to hear (thanks Beth I needed that splash of cold water).
Some times love is going some place you never want to be just to offer a word of encouragement.
Some times love is a huge hug where no words are actually spoken but a thousand things are said. It's one where you know when to pull close and when to let go.
Love is so much more than words or gifts.

Dining adventure

For quite some time now, I've been want to visit a place called "Hurts Donuts" in Springfield, Mo.
By coincidence, the hubby needed to pick something up in Springfield and I finally got to visit. They are open 24 hours and have been featured on the food network. The donuts did not disappoint.

I picked out some cookie monster donuts to take to my grandson-and no, I did not give him a dozen. These things were huge.

 But not as big as the Maple bacon plank that Dwight ate(to be honest I had to help the poor man)

 We saved the mint for Sunday-and it was just wonderful.

 There was one covered in Reeses (but you could choose one covered in twix bars too)

I got a red velvet covered in cream cheese and it was so sweet, it took three 

people to finish it, but look how pretty it was.